There are a couple things that come to mind with Thanksgiving approaching next week … time with family and After-Thanksgiving Day sales. I love to spend time with family and some years it is a time that I get to see family that lives out of town. I’m also one of those millions of shoppers that wake up insanely early to stand out in the cold to be one of the first couple hundred customers.

A few years back, being one of the first to stand in the cold meant gaining a prize. I planned the store priority based off of the prize given for being one of the first customers. My sister and I would split up and “Divide and Conquer” as she referred to it. However lately, store freebies are becoming a rarity and instead the store priority is based off of the best deals. (The bargain shopper in me is a sucker for a great deal!)

I’ve gotten a little smarter over the years. Now Wal-Mart is often my first stop. As a 24-hour store, the waiting happens indoors … not out. If you’ve ever been to Wal-Mart for their After-Thanksgiving Day sale, it’s an experience.

Palettes of products are stacked in the aisles tightly wrapped in cellophane. Shoppers try to peer through the wrapping to see if the palette contains their prize item, while employees stand guard restraining eager shoppers. Last year while waiting, I gently lifted up a corner of the wrapping to make sure I was waiting in front of the right palette.

“Stop picking!” the not-so-happy employee yelled. (“Picking” was serious business I discovered.)

Crowds gather, shopping carts clutter the aisles, and everyone waits as shoppers review their lists and plan their next destination. Then the moment finally arrives. Employees push through the crowd, tear the wrapping, and the coveted products are unveiled.

Chaos begins.

Hands and arms dive in to grab products. Items are thrown to friends and family further back in the crowd like a football. Irritated shoppers, unable to push through the masses, spout their frustration as shopping carts clang together. Shoppers fight for the last item left on the palette. Outdoors, the parking lot scene isn’t much different. Yes, that’s what they call Black Friday in the retail industry. A day their books leave the red zone, and reach the black instead.

By the time the sun rises, I’ve finished my shopping and head home with Christmas presents hidden in the trunk. Apart from getting fantastic deals for Christmas presents, I would not choose to shop on that day. It’s seems to be the exact opposite attitude of what Thanksgiving is all about — giving thanks for the abundance we have.

In all the years of shopping on that early morning, I cannot think of any time I’ve heard thankfulness uttered in all the shouting. Smiles and happiness is sparingly found. What is it about that day that brings out the worst in people?

It’s just stuff. Stuff we think we need, but it often leaves us always wanting more. Jim Carrey’s character in How the Grinch Stole Christmas says it best:

“That’s what it’s always been about! Gifts, gifts, gifts, gifts, gifts, gifts! Do you know what happens to your gifts? They all come to me in your garbage. Do you see what I’m saying here? IN YOUR GARBAGE! “I want golf clubs!” “I want diamonds!”

We can so easily get caught up in all the things we think we need, yet we miss the abundance of what we have. Kids exemplify this loud and clear. As parents we can’t help but shed light on their ungratefulness. Yet, aren’t we guilty too?

How many times are we disappointed because we don’t have something we’d really like to have? How many times do we find ourselves needing to upgrade our home furnishings because someone we know just got all new things? Do we buy a larger TV because there is now a bigger one available than what we presently have? Do we think we need a new car because everyone else seems to have a nicer one?

At times, I’m guilty. It is then I feel discontent. It is then I struggle with the unfairness of life. It is then I am dissatisfied and left empty. It’s a black day for me, but for the opposite reason … it’s not pretty.

This Thanksgiving, I hope Black Friday doesn’t overshadow our thoughts and focus away from the reason for celebrating Thanksgiving. We have been given much. But gratefulness isn’t a one day event, but an attitude we should live by.

“As we express our gratitude, we must never forget that the highest appreciation is not to utter words, but to live by them.” ~John Fitzgerald Kennedy