As I sit here this morning, the soothing music swells in the background while my candles flicker their luster. It brings to my mind the light we flash to our children.

Some days my glow is rather dim. Other days my wick is cut too short and the flame blows out time after time. These are not my shining moments as a mom, but it is from these moments that I learn and grow.

Did we take time to listen or just spout our thoughts? Were we exhausted? Did we take on too many commitments that now have us overwhelmed? Are we weary in need of renewal? Where did it all go wrong?

The difficulty comes in that life doesn’t afford extra time for pondering. It races to the next task or the next problem to solve. But as parents, we need to take time for evaluation in order to restore the luster in our light.

The light from my candle grows dim when it’s at the bottom of the wick and it needs some rejuvenation. To parent on empty ensures I will spew out the attitudes I care not to spurt. With a short wick, I need to scrap away the wax engulfing the wick to allow it room to glow once again. These are the times I take out my calendar and start erasing.

When we take a few moments to look at what is behind our fading shimmer, the flame can rise and sparkle once again.

When my daughter was in kindergarten, I relayed to my boss something undesirable that she did.

“Where does she get this from? I just don’t understand.” I insisted.

My boss laughed. By the look on my face, he quickly realized I was not joking.

“You’re serious?” He said.

“Yes!” I said emphatically.

Silence. I walked out of his office and thought about it all day. When I got home that night, I told my husband what happened. “Please tell me … do I do that? Does she get it from me?”

He waited a moment looking gently at me, and then said softly, “Honey … you’re getting better.”

I appreciate greatly his honesty. It was after that moment that I took the not-so-desirable behaviors or attitudes I saw in my daughter and put them to thought and prayer asking, “Do I do this?” The majority of the time, I was guilty.

Have you ever had one of those moments where you realized your child is mimicking you? Usually they don’t pick up on the magnificent qualities we possess. Instead they pick up on the little irritating things we tend to not see ourselves.

Our children are a mirror for us. We cannot do one thing and expect they will not follow suit. They watch our every action, move, behavior, and attitude — they are great copycats.

Let’s work hard to be a great example for our children.

Your example is much more powerful than anything you can ever say. — Elisabeth Elliot

Today is Back-to-Reality Day. No more sitting around the table stuffing ourselves. No more gatherings of extended family from out of town for a while. No more all play and no work. Today, reality comes crashing back. The daily routine is back in motion.

Feeling refreshed after a few days off and relaxing, I rationalized whether I should exercise this morning to work off the extra calories ingested the past few days. Then I read my calendar’s statement today:

“I don’t even know how this word came into being: “aerobics.” I guess gym instructors got together and said, ‘If we’re going to charge ten dollars an hour, we can’t call it “jumping up and down.'” — Rita Rudner

That put a smile on my face. My shins are already sore from walking so much Friday at the After Thanksgiving Sales. Maybe it wasn’t jumping up and down, but it was much walking to and from and standing in lines. Doesn’t that count?

Do you ever find that we want to change a word because we don’t like how it sounds? “Control” sounds as if we’re headstrong dictators. So we prefer “Take Charge Individuals.” That has an air of leadership qualities. “Big Spender” sounds frivolous, but “Just Appreciates Quality” makes us sound responsible in our expenditures. “Opinionated” gives off a harsh feeling, but “Firm in Beliefs” sounds grounded.

The bottom line is, we can paint something any way we want, but it doesn’t hide what’s within. We end up only fooling ourselves.

Perhaps I need to go do some jumping up and down, or lift some heavy things until my muscles throb. Not as appealing I must say, but it’s the truth. I know I’ll feel better when I’m done.