Newspaper headlines are discouraging. Yet, they reveal the reality of our society.
Today, every day violence, sex, child abuse, and substance abuse can be found gracing numerous pages of the newspaper. Entering rehab for alcohol before reaching the legal age to drink has become more common. Divorce is the norm, not the exception. Drugs have become an entrepreneurial endeavor for the white-collar worker. Now, the number of incarcerated adults topples 2.3 million nationwide.
There is no shortage of difficulty or depressing news around us. Thriving each day can be a struggle.
When things get difficult, we each respond differently. Withdraw and retreat. Pray. Get busy. Seek comfort. Avoid. Rage.
So much of being a parent flows from our example. Our children watch how we handle what life throws our way. They learn our coping skills and then carry them into adulthood.
We are raising the future leaders of our country. What is it we’d like to pass on?
Solitude. Dark roast coffee. Just a side table for my computer and I. Sound pitiful? Perhaps on the surface, but truth be told … these ingredients make up my weekly getaway to a local bookstore’s coffee shop. And I look forward to it every week!
Life gets chaotic and some days we endure things not so fun — such as my morning dental appointment today. It’s such days where I anxiously await my alone time. My 1 1/2 hours of solitude to read, write, vegetate, or drink lots of dark-roasted coffee.It doesn’t matter what I do — it’s just my time to be.
For me, I find it helpful to make some of my solitude time away from home. That way, other household demands can’t trail along with me. The laundry hangs out in the hamper. The phone rests in the charger. The dishes remain, wherever they are whether dirty or clean. My husband and daughter do their thing. The dishes never complain and the phone is meticulous about taking messages. The clothes? I’ve never heard them scream. And my family enjoys their own routines during this time too.
For grins, I looked up the word getaway and laughed at one of the words referenced — “absent yourself.” I like that! It’s almost like telling life’s demands, “Hey, I’m sorry but I’m stepping out for a while.”
The word I like most was “retreat.” A retreat sounds like a day spent at the spa or on a tropical beach. My not-quiet-two-hour retreat doesn’t provide a spa or beach, but rejuvenation certainly shows up.
As parents, we often hold out anxiously awaiting our next vacation for rest — that is if we planned one. Such big trips are fantastic, but mini getaways contain their own treasures.
“But I don’t have time to getaway,” I hear some say. Remember the word ‘mini?’ Little escapes here and there. Small bits of time. Brief havens. It’s possible, but we need to get creative.
One friend of mine with two small children took advantage of visiting family by escaping for an hour each day to get a coffee and window shop — alone. The quick daily retreat provided the renewal she needed.
Need a few ideas for your next absent-yourself-event? Take a bath after the children go to bed to melt away the worries of the day. Sneak a book and flashlight under the covers at night — it’s a silly retreat that makes you feel young again. Wake up before your family, to a quiet house. Walk the dog to release stress robbers.
It doesn’t matter where your getaway is, just make sure it includes the opportunity to just be. So where will your next retreat be?
Laughter is contagious. Ever notice when someone is laughing hysterically, you can’t help but join in?
In college, in the midst of a big laughing fit, I instinctively began to wave my hand in front of my face like a fan. I’m not sure why … whether I thought it would give me needed air or what, but back then laughter and waving went hand-in-hand. These oddities made everyone laugh harder, which created further waving from me.
I somehow outgrew my waving instincts, but not my desire to laugh. The sound of my laughter is one hard to ignore — it’s loud and perhaps to some, rather obnoxious. I just figure I’m expelling unwanted stress with each thunderous hoot.
In the midst of busyness, a challenging situation, or stress, laughter has the ability to change our drab outlook. Unfortunately, the first to disappear in such times, is fun and laughter.
I’ve been known to let my goofy side shine under such stress-filled days. One of my specialties is to put on music and dance in no apparent style — just having fun. After the initial expected embarrassment by my daughter, she joins in while my husband sits on the couch and laughs at his two wacky women. Before long, laughter and fun fill our home and the cares of the day dissipate.
When did we last cut loose, have fun, and laugh? Maybe it’s time to let your goofy side shine!
