As parents our roles are numerous. One important role is being our child’s ultimate cheerleader.
I recently caught the tail end of a documentary of a famous recording artist. Immediately, the support and encouragement of the mother shined. When others discredited the talent of the young aspiring artist, the mother beamed proudly with firm belief, and forever nudged her child to press on.
As the documentary lingered in my mind, I couldn’t help but evaluate my own abilities to be my daughter’s cheerleader. At times, I succeed. Other times, I miss vital opportunities.
What is an opportunity? It’s a pause or a moment in time where we are given an opening. In being our child’s cheerleader, it’s an opening to spur him or her on to greatness. The adventure comes in not knowing what the final greatness is to be, but looking for glimpses or sparks just waiting to be further ignited.
A cheerleader isn’t reserved for the athletic department. A cheerleading parent finds the beauty in a child’s first piano piece, the vulnerability in a child’s poem, the tender heart of a helpful child, or the strength in a child’s individuality.
Life is full of openings to encourage our children. Rather than see missed opportunities behind us, let’s capture each possibility that skips our way.
“Don’t wait for extraordinary opportunities. Seize common occasions and make them great.” — Orison Swett Marden
We returned from a wonderful family vacation last week. Always after a vacation, there seems to be a few days needed to catch our breath before we get back into a routine.
As I’ve thought about our summer routine, I am reminded it always looks a little different than I anticipate. That isn’t necessarily a bad thing, but it just reminds me of the need to be flexible as a parent.
Floor sweeping may wait an extra day, as the child’s bedroom organization took longer than anticipated. Laundry may still lay folded in the living room as the family discussion proved far more important. Time for self may temporarily be interrupted in order to listen to our child’s creative writing story. Coveted sleep may be ripped away when our child experiences ear pain during the night.
Flexibility and routine can contradict themselves. I’ve swung both ends of the pendulum. I’ve scheduled every day of our summer to only be left frustrated that items were taken longer than the schedule allowed. I’ve also swung the other direction in scheduling nothing and leaving it all to chance, but spent each day irritated that I accomplished nothing on the list.
Now, I’ve moved towards a more flexible routine … is that an oxymoron?I know what I’d like to accomplish each day, what we need to complete, and what would be fun to do. Then I surrender it all to God and go forward one hour at a time. By midday, I assess how it’s going (when I remember to) and we make changes (if possible).
This causes far less stress for everyone in the house. My kitchen may still be a mess when I go to sleep one night, but I can rest confidently knowing that the things that took precedence over the dishes were more important for that day. Dishes will still be there in the morning.
Remember the flexible metal slinky we played with as a kid? When I didn’t take time to place it straight or if the first drop was too steep, it hit the walls and careened down the staircase out of control. But, if I placed it straight ahead on the stair making sure the staircase wasn’t too steep, it bent and slinked from step to step in a fluid motion. Perhaps that’s a picture of a flexible routine.
We can point our day in the direction we need to go while taking a peek at the terrain in front of us for potential pitfalls. Then we let go and allow God to work in us to accomplish what HE desires for us to do that day.
Stay committed to your decisions, but stay flexible in your approach.
The mad dash begins with only four days left of school. I dropped off the massive science project this morning at school as it was too large for my daughter to carry along with her backpack and instrument.
“What did you do — kill a bird?” the teacher says to me upon my arrival.
I’m not sure if that was a compliment of my daughter’s life-like duck in her freshwater ecosystem, or a crack at the size of the bird sitting in its habitat. Regardless, it’s an item checked off my list.
Next … laundry. I’m grateful for the light breeze this morning as I placed the drying rack in front of the sliding glass door to speed up the air drying process. Jeans are next to hang. I’m anxious to get “laundry” checked off my list as well.
After that? My list is lengthy, so I have an assortment to choose from. As I folded clothes this morning, I slowed down and reminded myself, Life as I know it, will NOT end in four days. It will just look different — it’s just summer.
It’s just summer … how can six little letters cause parents to scurry? Somehow, they do. It’s like a subconscious need to accomplish everything before school is out. After that, the routine is out the window.
Recently when my daughter and I wrote our lists of what we’d like to do this summer, I stressed the need for balance as she wrote her list. We then read our lists to each other.
“How many of your items can be done while I work and write?” I asked.
She paused briefly and said, “Just a couple, Mom.”
At this point, I could get flustered and worry about how I’ll accomplish everything, but I’ve gone down that road too many times before and I know it leads no where. It reminded me of my prayer displayed on my desk,
“Guide me Lord to do what you desire me to do this day! May it not be just a list of things to accomplish, but a day to fulfill your plans.”
I’ve learned I can’t look at the entire summer in one glance, as that causes my breakers to short circuit. Instead, I have to take one bite at a time. God knows what He desires for me to accomplish as a parent, employee, and writer, so I just entrust it into His hands. He can carry a much heavier load than I can.
So, on that note, here are a few more ideas for thriving this summer with your children:
Garage Sales. On Friday mornings, we like to hit the garage sales in our area. It’s fun to start out with just a few dollars and see how far your money can spread. Years back, my very first writing area came from garage sale finds. For under $10, I bought a shelf, decor, and glider chair!
Outings. Library, park, grocery shopping — whatever it is, make it fun and engage the kids. Give young children their own list of items to find in the grocery store. Allow the older kids to read in the teen section of your local library (an area no adults are allowed) and give them their wanted independence. Look for nature at a park or on a hiking trail.
Spontaneous Mini-Trip to …?. Take a picnic lunch and hop in the car to drive somewhere unknown. Here’s how it works. Make it a group effort and take turns saying which direction you should drive and for how long. For example, “Let’s go straight for 5 minutes, then left for 3 minutes.” Set a time limit. Then wherever you end up, hop out of the car, and have your picnic lunch.
Play office. If you need to get some work done and have younger children, give them their own “office setup” and allow them to play next to you while you work. When my daughter was young, she loved this! She had an envelope of stickers, scratch paper, old file folders, and the use of tape. She made files, organized papers, and wrote “important” (but illegible) things. She loved showing me her efforts.
Remember you are not alone — as parents, we are in this together!
