One of the earliest parenting concepts I knew I wanted to implement with my children came long before I became a parent: Commit to always tell my children the moral reason why. Rather than just a list of do’s and don’ts, I saw the importance of instilling in my children the moral reason behind the rule, guideline, or boundary.

I knew from my own experience growing up, just having a rule given without the moral understanding of why, was a recipe for disaster. I lacked the moral understanding of consequence and affect on my future beyond the obvious grounding or that it wasn’t what a “good Christian” does.

When my daughter was two-years old, it was harder to get out a full explanation of moral reasoning as her attention span waned quickly. I remember telling myself, “Get it out quicker next time!” Clearly the appropriate explanation for a two year old differs from that of a teenager. However, at each age, deeper understanding is important.

Just like us, our children have a sinful nature and it’s a natural tendency to want to take the path of least resistance, rebel, push the limits, or think we are somehow exempt from “that” every happening to us.

Often, the quick response we give to our children asking why is, “Because I said so” or “It’s the right thing to do.” But how will that reasoning suffice when our children have their moments of, What if I don’t want to do the right thing or I’m mad at her right now so who cares what she said!

As parents, we need to make sure we teach our children the whole picture. What happens when we break that rule—physically, spiritually, or emotionally? What is the greater purpose of the boundary? What affect does thinking on destructive or immoral things have on our heart and mind and how does that change our overall focus long term? What does the Bible say about it?

It may not be the fastest response, but it’s the more complete response that gives our children tools to do life in their future!

Given last week my daughter’s final classes wrapped up and our homeschooling season came to a close, the topic of finishing and finishing well came up. There is a difference. Finishing can mean just checking off all the boxes and calling it good. Finishing well entails giving it 100% all the way to the end, not skimping or rushing through, but making sure you’ve done your very best in every aspect even up until the very last moment.

I explained to my daughter it’s all about where we set our bar. If we set it pretty low, then finishing is a breeze. If we reach for something higher and better, then more effort, planning, and perseverance are required to finish.

As a parent, I desire to finish well. When I send my daughter off to college in a few short years, I hope I can say with confidence that as a parent I finished well to prepare her for the next phase of her life into adulthood. Some days I’m more confident in that process than others, but regardless I’m not willing to lower the bar.

Apart from my role as a parent, I desire to finish well as a woman living out the desires and plans God has for me. I think about how our season of homeschooling has now come to an end and I look forward to what God has in store for me personally in that new free time opening up during the day. I know I can fill it with all sorts of good volunteer things, enjoyable activities, or even a part time job, but I don’t want to just fill up my days with …. stuff. I want to set the bar higher and have my life count for something bigger. When I think and pray along those lines, I get excited.

Whatever your upcoming week entails or whatever the season you are in demands, plan to finish well. You’ll feel better knowing you did your best, in spite of difficulty and obstacles, pushing through even up to the very end!

As the final installment of this little Top 10 list of mine, here are the final top three things I’ve learned homeschooling my 16-year old daughter the past three years:

#3. I am more patient than I realized. Three years ago, the idea that I was a patient person was almost comical. I’m okay with admitting it wasn’t a personality trait high on my list. But then I started homeschooling and I discovered how much capacity for patience I really had. Or perhaps more accurately put, God was so kind to give me many opportunities to exercise and grow patience within me. So don’t think that you could never do something, it just might be the exact opportunity God desires for you to do, so he can grow a specific characteristic in you!

#2. God’s plans are far bigger and far reaching than mine. When we decided to homeschool, it was to serve a few purposes and with the understanding it was for a season – a minimum of two years, possibly three and we would reassess. Little did we know, God had planned all along to use our choice to homeschool to prepare our daughter to move 2,000 miles away three years later. Not one who liked change, our daughter nervously ventured into a whole new realm and group of people in the homeschool community. Very soon, she began to see that change wasn’t the enemy. She tried new things. She made new friends. God even used her to be the first to bring to light His future desires for us to move cross country. Rather than be fearful to leave the only place she knew, she was energized. Fast forward two years now that we’ve just moved cross country–we are blown away by how she’s freely stepped out without hesitation into unknown territories that we never dreamed she would. God knew what was needed three years ago in preparation for what He had in store for her this year. Never underestimate God’s purposes when he nudges you to do something!

#1. Time is limited and I need to make the most of every moment. I have been blessed to have a close relationship with my daughter, but I had no idea how much closer we would become through the homeschooling process. Due to our extra time together, I had even more opportunities to speak into her life to help her grow and learn through some difficult situations and challenges. What a blessing it has been to have the opportunity to closely watch her grow tremendously these past three years. I continually thought about how soon the day she leaves for college will come. I kept in the forefront of my mind daily that my window of time to speak into her life and help her soar in the safety net of our home was dwindling. I strive to make every day count!

Whatever your day entails with your children, make every moment matter. Our job as parents is critical — don’t let a day go by without speaking into your child’s life!