Karla Kassebaum

Recently I remodeled my home office. The before pictures resembled a perfect case for the clutter police.

Apparently there was a time that I must have thought more is better. My walls were plastered with so many things my head spun looking at them. Paperwork piles spilled onto my floors like a gigantic bucket of Legos dumped onto the floor. My craft table held a plethora of items — none of which had to do with crafts. And at one time, I even fit a treadmill in the cluttered room. This room has always overwhelmed me.

It was time to attack it once and for all and dig in. My husband beamed when he saw me bring out trash bag after trash bag. My daughter wondered who stole her mother as she exclaimed, “This isn’t like you mom!”

My husband graciously built me closet organizers, and painted my walls while I shopped for the perfect wall decor — not too much, nothing overwhelming. I wanted a room to relax for my quiet times, a room where I would want to escape and write, and even melt when the stresses of life overwhelmed me.

After four months, my office is done. It’s perfect! My love for the beach is my theme. The colors are soothing while the message to “Relax” is tactfully placed on each wall. Not too much, not too little. I can melt in my beach-type sitting area. Now I look back at the before pictures and wonder how I existed with so much clutter in this room just a few short months ago.

It’s easy to allow our lives to fill up with clutter. We get accustomed to how it feels and looks and it becomes our normal. When we recognize it, overwhelming feelings can threaten to take us under. But don’t let them! Keep your head up and get out the garbage bags to remove what weighs you down!

“You did it!” “Congratulations.” “You’ve come so far.” “What an achievement.”

Everyone wants to be successful. Society shouts their view of success. However, what truly does success look like for a parent?

If we had to name five top indicators of a successful parent, what would they be? Perhaps what first comes to mind centers on a child’s exterior performances, a child’s visible achievements, or how a parent’s child rates on the popularity scale. But is that really parental success?

By definition, success means achievement of intention. In that light, the question becomes what as parents do we plan or attempt to achieve?  The picture of success then changes.

If busy schedules overwhelm you, then having an actual sit-down dinner together three nights a week becomes a parental success. If one-on-one time with your children is always overshadowed by daily demands, then one planned outing every few weeks becomes a parental success.

So take a moment today, to define what successes you intend to achieve as parents. The culmination of little parental successes brings about achievements with lasting value for our children.